Continuing our conversation about burnout, let's talk about the second indicator: depersonalization. I distinctly remember a few years ago when I read about this burnout symptom, and I thought to myself, "Oh my God, this is me. The people I set out to serve have become a 'them' to me." That was a crystallizing moment for me; I knew I had a problem.
Depersonalization compounds emotional exhaustion (last week's post) by creating a lack of passion for work and a lack of care for "them." In burnout inventories, we see depersonalization when someone experiences cynicism, insensitivity, or negativity towards those they serve. This happens when the job has become a burden and is challenging to stay engaged in. Depersonalization sucks.
For me, depersonalization looks like losing passion and enthusiasm. The job has become more of a chore than an engaging way to serve the people around me. And, like emotional exhaustion, I find depersonalization disturbing when I sense it in myself. In the corporate world, I chose my roles and teams based on the ways I wanted to serve, grow, and help others grow. And when I finally burned out to the level of depersonalization, I felt like I was failing at living out my values.
The solutions to depersonalization, like the solutions to all of burnout, take slow and deliberate healing. Here are a few patterns that can help:
- At the end of the day, review what you accomplished and make a list of what you need to do tomorrow. Prioritize the items on your list so that you know what is most important. This keeps you focused on your priorities rather than an endless mountain of potential work.
- As you leave work, check in with your body. Are you exhausted? Are you standing erect or bent over? What expression is on your face? How do you want to leave the building? What would it look like to leave that way?
- Before you get home, think about leaving your work behind. Be aware of the transition of "coming home." Be ready to make eye contact and relate to people positively. Try changing into other clothes when you get home to help your body truly transition from work to home.
The last one has been especially helpful to me over the years. I used to feel silly for changing out of perfectly good and comfortable clothes when I got home to put on other perfectly good and comfortable clothes. But it was a comforting ritual that I decided to keep despite the fact that it created more laundry. When I read burnout research, I felt vindicated - changing clothes was a research-indicated pattern to help reduce burnout. Turns out my body knew something valuable that my mind was unwilling to accept!
What about you? What are your simple transitional ceremonies that help you protect against burnout?
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